A Mother's Reflection on the 50th birthday of a son

A Mother's Reflection on the 50th birthday of a son. I consider the birthdays of my children significant, because it is the day I've given birth to them. It is the day I suffered the utmost pain and the unspeakable joy when they came out of the world crying our loud to announce to the whole world that they are healthy and well. One of the first questions a mother would ask the attending physician is: How is my baby? Are there no birth defects? I then praise God for giving me perfect babies. Only a mother knows the experience of birthing. Mary Ann had an advantage over everyone of my children. She was born without anesthesia. I felt every pain, was aware of every movement. I thought Dr. Maura Posadas the attending physician was heartless for letting me go through the painful process of birthing without a pain killer. But I realized later that it was euphoric. After the most painful part - the crowining - comes the most wonderful feeling one could never describe. Today is the 50th birthday of Arwin. Yesterday's surprise birthday arranged by Theresa and his children was indeed a hard act to follow. I knew that Arwin would be mad at me for disrupting his day by requesting that he picks me up for an appointment with a prospective client who would like to buy a 3-bedroom house. The scenario was very credible and the motivation is real. Arwin may have thought, "Perhaps, Mama needs the compensation. Why of all days would she schedule me to meet her friend." A perfect surprise needs a grand deception and I was a party to it. Good work, Theresa. The band was very good. The food was healthy. The ambiance was cozy and comfortable for family and friends. It was truly an American experience. Thank you for your creativity and for the fun and fellowship. 10 highlights of the life of Arwin, from a mother's perspective. : 1. He grew up with his Grandma Andrea. We were all around the table in our apartment in Quezon City (forgot the name of the street) - Mama, Daddy, Mary Ann, Gia, and Bobby when I asked each one, ":who would like to come with Grandma to San Carlos? He was the only one who raised his hand. (Mary Ann was six years old then and she already stayed with her Grandma for almost two years, but she was becoming a spoiled since she gets everything she wants from her Lola). 2. He got sick with pneumonia in San Carlos. The late Dr. Gudelia Padlanwas at his bedside. Arwin was breathing so heavily and the doctor told me, he has a 50/50 chance to live. I prayed as I never prayed before. Then the critical hour came, Arwin woke up and said, "Mama, danom." I gave him a glass of water. Dr. Padlan jumped with joy and said, "He is going to live!" It was answered prayer and the joy overwhelmed me with tears. 3. Daddy and I wanted Arwin to attend college in Manila. Daddy enrolled him in U.P. to take up Sports Management. After a month, he decided to join a fraternity without informing us. I came home early one afternoon and I saw him lying down fast asleep. I examined his legs and it was all black and blue. I cried and was so mad. 4. A girl - Colette entered his life. She is quite a dancer, being a member of a dance troupe with occasional TV appearances. Then I found a note written by Arwin to Colette, telling her of what he doesn't like with his mother, that devastated me but he made me feel so guilty for being a "bad" mother for giving away her son. But I kept 5. He leaves UP and he decided to go back to San Carlos to be with his Lola. (That was also the time when Carlo stayed with his Lola.) 6. One early morning Arwin arrived from San Carlos. I asked him, Why are you here? Is it already your semestral break? No, I just want to come for a visit. Later on there was a call for him to go back to San carlos. I found out later that he was being held responsible for a students' strike against VMEI for unfair practices. 7. Arwin gets married to Theresalynn Soriano. Lots of drama. Arwin was drunk after a party the night before. He was still groogy when he woke up to prepare for his wedding. 8. Arwin arrives at Investment St. to inform me that Theresa is leaving for the USA with the children. He is staying behind since he has a good job as population officer and as right hand man of Mayor Douglas Soriano. I put my foot down with a strong "NO". He should go to the USA with his family, to have a common experience. I've learned my lesson. He said, money is short. No, I said, God will provide. Indeed , God provided. 9. Arwin leaves the Philippines on September 10, 1991 (?) after celebrating his birthday. I asked him about their plans. They will stay with Teresa's relatives in Riverside. I worried about their child care needs. 10. Mama arrives in Chula Vista at Gia's home on October 20. I found the whole family cramped in one room. I was surprised to find that Arwin has already a job in Boradway. Theresa was already working as Dental Assistant. Daddy and I turned baby sitter for Jawee, Aura, and Arlynn for a few months until they found a home of their own - the rest is history. I think I'll start writing my Memoir before memories fade. I seem not to remember the dates and places. Mama